Opposites Attract: A CraisJool Story
by MyGirlCrais
Summary: Shippy series I wrote long before Crais was 'misplaced'. Not talking about the D word.
1. All Work And No Play

'Opposites Attract: A Crais/Jool Series'  
  
Disclaimer: Farscape belongs to a lot of people. Unfortunately, I'm not one of them.  
  
Timing: Post 'Thanks For Sharing', but with only one Crichton. Now very AU.  
  
Feedback: Always welcome.  
  
A/N: Written well before 'The Final Four' and S4, each chapter was originally posted as a separate story. Here it seemed easier to put them all together. I did intend to add more to the series, but there's no cliffhanger at the end so it's safe to read as is. Light reading, mostly shippy stuff. Enjoy.  
  
  
'All Work And No Play'  
  
  
"Crais, what on Earth are you doing?"  
  
"I am attempting to repair Talyn's damaged conduits," Crais answered, glancing up at Crichton in irritation.  
  
"It's the middle of the night."  
  
"Thank you Crichton, I am aware of that."  
  
"Don't you ever sleep?"  
  
"I am not tired at present."  
  
"Crais, you've been over here workin' 24/7 for days. Don't you ever take time out for fun?"  
  
"I do not require 'fun' either."  
  
"The hell you don't! You've got bags under your eyes big enough for the grocery shopping and you're even more antisocial than usual."  
  
Crais ignored him.  
  
"Look, we'll be at the next commerce planet tomorrow. We're all getting a little R'n'R. Are you coming?"  
  
"I would prefer to stay here."  
  
"Fine, have it your way, but you can't stay on Talyn. I need you to come to Moya and baby-sit the princess."  
  
"I am sure that Jool can take care of herself."  
  
"Maybe so, but she's the new girl on board and I'm not leaving her alone."  
  
"Fine," Crais said, in no mood to start a lengthy discussion. "I will come to Moya tomorrow. For the moment, may I get back to what I was doing?"  
  
"Sure Crais, whatever, I'm going to bed," Crichton strolled off down the corridor. 'There's a guy in desperate need of a life' he thought to himself.  
  
***  
  
Jool sat, looking at Crais. Of all the people she could have been left here with, why him? The first time they'd met he'd tried to strangle her. Since then D'Argo had found time to fill her in on Crais' less than rosy past. While Crais didn't seem quite the monster he'd described, Jool still wasn't exactly keen on being alone with him. What the hezmana had Crichton been thinking? 'Get him to lighten up,' he'd said. Lighten up? How could she relax with a man she was half afraid to turn her back on?   
  
It didn't look like he was exactly thrilled to be here either. They'd sat here in silence for what felt like arns. Crais was reading something on an infopad.   
  
Crais was pretending to read something on an infopad. It meant that he could avoid a conversation. It was bad enough that he had to sit here when he could have been doing essential maintenance, he was not going to entertain her as well. Crais didn't understand why Crichton thought that Jool needed to be looked after. She might be young, but that didn't mean she couldn't stay out of trouble for a few arns. She looked as uncomfortable as he felt. He had a suspicion that she was no keener on the arrangement than him.  
  
"Why didn't you go down to the commerce planet with the others?" Jool asked suddenly.  
  
"I intended to do maintenance work on Talyn." The implication that she was the reason why he was not doing so was not lost on Jool.  
  
"Don't let me stop you," she said, irritated by his tone.  
  
"It was agreed that the two of us should remain together on Moya, in case of any problems arising."  
  
"Take me with you," Jool said. "Pilot can call us if there's a problem."  
  
"I doubt you would find it interesting to watch me work."  
  
'More interesting than this,' she thought.  
  
"Maybe I could help," she said out loud.  
  
"I wasn't aware that you knew anything about leviathans."  
  
"I don't, specifically, but I'm sure there's something I could do."  
  
Crais considered this. He didn't want her messing with his ship, but at least he might get some work done. That way it wouldn't be a completely wasted day.  
  
"Very well," he said. "Follow me."  
  
***  
  
"So, how long will it take for the power to come back on line?"  
  
"I do not know." How could he know? He'd never caused a complete shut down like that. He still didn't know how she'd managed it. He'd turned his back for one microt and his ship was dead in the water.   
  
"Can I do something?"  
  
"I rather think," Crais answered, his patience wafer thin, "that you've done enough for one day."  
  
"But if I just..." she reached out to touch a console. Crais grabbed her arm roughly and pulled it back.  
  
"Do not touch anything!" he yelled. "You have already caused more damage than I thought possible! Sit there and do nothing!"  
  
Jool sat. Crais turned his attention to the console and began to assess the damage. It appeared that she had merely given Talyn a shock. He would awake, but not for several arns yet. He was studying the readouts more closely when he heard a strange sound behind him.  
  
Jool was crying. She'd never meant to harm Talyn. She'd only been trying to help. But whatever she did they still hated her. First they'd left her here with a man *they* didn't even trust while they all went off to have fun and now he was furious with her. Why couldn't anyone like her? She always been loved before. And now here she was, in hell.  
  
Crais was taken aback. He was used to yelling at people, but not people who responded like this. Peacekeepers didn't cry and none of Moya's crew cried because he got mad at them. In fact, they usually seemed not to care very much at all. Jool was obviously different. He sensed that he should try to stop her crying. The problem was, he didn't have the slightest idea how. Racking his brain, he found himself recalling a phrase of Crichton's 'kiss and make up'. Jool wasn't human, but she was a similar species wasn't she? It was a long shot, but it was the best idea he had.  
  
Jool got the shock of her life when, in one swift movement, Crais tipped her face up and brought his lips down on hers. But, after a moment, she found herself returning his kiss. Crais too quickly discovered that the experience was far from unpleasant. And, for the first time in a long while, they both forgot everything else.  
  
Jool's head was spinning by the time they separated.  
  
"What did you do that for?" she asked in a daze.  
  
"I was trying to make you stop crying," Crais said, feeling somewhat unsettled himself. He regarded her. "It seems to have worked."  
  
"It...seemed to help," Jool said.  
  
They looked at each other for a moment.  
  
"I still feel...upset...about Talyn," Jool ventured to say.  
  
Despite his usual reserve, Crais accepted the invitation.  
  
***  
  
"Where's Crais?" Crichton asked, when he and the others arrived back on Moya.  
  
Jool jumped.  
  
"He's...I mean, I think that he returned to Talyn."  
  
"I thought I told you to stay with him."  
  
"I...I did...but now you're back, I...he...didn't need to stay."  
  
"What's with you?" Crichton said. "You're so jumpy."  
  
"Nothing," Jool said, too quickly.  
  
"Right," Crichton answered casually.  
  
***  
  
Crichton's sixth sense told him that something was going on. He didn't know exactly what, but there was definitely something. No-one else seemed to notice it. He might not know Jool too well, but she definitely acted like there was something on her mind. And, since he'd first noticed it when they returned from the commerce planet, it must be something that had happened while she was alone with Crais.  
  
What he couldn't figure out. While he didn't completely trust Crais, he didn't think that he would have hurt her. And Pilot confirmed that nothing unusual had taken place while they were on the planet. So it was a mystery. At least, for now.  
  
***  
  
Crais was on Talyn trying to work. He'd returned before the others had come back from the planet and he'd hadn't left since. This was no way for an ex-Captain to behave. He'd always believed that avoiding things was a futile exercise, you still had to face them in the end and the wait only made the worry increase. But this was a new situation. The truth was, he was hesitating because he wasn't entirely sure how to proceed. What occurred on Talyn had been completely out of the blue. He admitted to himself that he'd found her attractive beforehand, but he'd never considered the possibility of a relationship. She did seem childlike in many ways compared to the people he was used to, even though that was the result of her upbringing. His own upbringing had taught him to despise mixed matings. He might have rejected Peacekeeper values, but he knew now that he'd unconsciously discounted her because she wasn't Sebacean. A few cycles ago the idea would have been out of the question - indeed repellent. Now....  
  
He hadn't spoken to her since...well, since she'd been here. Obviously he needed to make the next move. The question was, what would that be?  
  
***  
  
Jool was feeling out of her depth. Where she came from, mating was a simple affair. When a person finished their studies, they chose their mate from a selection that their parents had carefully put together. If she hadn't been captured on her trip she would have chosen one herself. You made your choice and that was it - easy.  
  
This was anything but. It wasn't just a new set of rules to learn - there were no rules! Crais had been a Peacekeeper. Peacekeepers didn't even have mates. Sebaceans did outside the military, but Crais hadn't known much of that life. Jool had no frame of reference to guide her and no idea of what should happen next. She didn't like that uncertainty. She only knew that she wanted more of what had happened on Talyn. But did he? She couldn't tell. Obviously, she needed to ask him. She just didn't know how.  
  
***  
  
Realisation had dawned.  
  
They avoided each other like the plague. They'd been left alone for arns but neither would talk about anything that had happened. They were both pre-occupied and shifty - as if they were trying to hide something.  
  
This, Crichton thought, could only mean one thing.  
  
It presented him with an interesting situation. As far as he was aware, he was the only one who had even the slightest inkling that there was something going on. They also seemed to be in need of some assistance. So, he could either help or cause some serious trouble. The second was definitely tempting. However, the implications of the situation were too important. Crais in love - that was something too good to miss. Plus it might make him a bit more fun to be around. No, it seemed that he was going to have to play cupid.  
  
***  
  
"Why do I have to go?" Jool asked reluctantly.  
  
"We need medical supplies. You know most about medicine, you get the supplies." Aeryn answered flatly.  
  
"You're going to send me down there alone?"  
  
"Of course not," Crichton said. "Crais is going with you."  
  
Jool turned away quickly, but not before Crichton saw the look in her eyes.  
  
"Why him?" she asked, trying to sound casual.  
  
"D'Argo and Chiana already left. Aeryn and I have a maintenance date. That leaves Crais. Unless you want to take Rygel?"  
  
"Fine," Jool said, deciding that whining wouldn't get her anywhere. "What do we need?"  
  
Crichton gave her the list.  
  
"It'll take us arns to get all this together!"  
  
"There's no rush," Crichton said, and walked out.  
  
Jool headed to the cargo bay, apprehension building with every step. This was the perfect opportunity to work things out. But how the hezmana would she start? With a casual mention that it was eight solar days since they...recreated...and they hadn't spoken a word to each other in that time? Or maybe she should wait and see if he would say something? It was very complicated.  
  
Crais was there, with the transport pod he'd brought over from Talyn. Despite the promise he'd made to himself that he would behave professionally, he found it hard to look her in the eye. Half of him wanted to stay, half of him wanted to run and all of him was unsure. That was not a feeling he enjoyed.  
  
She climbed aboard without a word and they started for the planet. Crais could see her out of the corner of his eye. He was almost certain she was looking at him, but the moment she turned his head slightly to check, she looked away. Was this normal behaviour for a woman of her species? He wished he knew more about other species. Peacekeeper training had unfortunately not included how to break the ice with an Interion. And the ice was getting thicker every moment.  
  
They reached the planet without having said a word to each other and began to search for the supplies. Jool was studying some specifications at a stall when something came down hard on her head, and everything went black.  
  
The first thing she saw when she came round was Crais' face looking down at her.   
  
"What happened?" she asked.  
  
"I am not certain. I saw you attacked but I didn't have time to stop it. When I tried to get to you, I was attacked too."  
  
"Why would someone want to attack us?"  
  
"I'm afraid we are going to have to wait until our attackers return to find out."  
  
Jool looked around her. They were in a dark, dirty cell. Just when she thought things couldn't possibly get any worse. Suddenly she was angry. Wasn't it bad enough that she was stuck on some prison ship with a bunch of escaped convicts who hated her? Wasn't it enough that she was frelling millions of metras from home? That her cousins were dead and she had been frozen for twenty-two cycles? That she had to live in a converted cell and eat food cubes? They had to lock her up as well!!!!  
  
Before Crais had time to stop her, she had jumped to her feet and hurled herself against the bars of the cell.   
  
"Let me out of here!" she yelled, hurling herself at them again. Her hair was so red it was practically glowing.  
  
Crais rose quickly and grabbed her arms before she could make another attempt.  
  
"Jool, stop that immediately! You'll injure yourself."  
  
It proved to be an unwise move. In her fury, Jool turned on him. She was surprisingly strong and he was caught off-guard. She grabbed his neck and thrust him against the wall.   
  
"Why the hezmana do you care if I hurt myself? Why would anyone care? Everybody hates me anyway!"  
  
Crais managed to pull her hand away from his neck. He spun her round so she was trapped against the wall.  
  
"That is not true," he said.  
  
"I suppose now you're going to tell me that you care about me. I'm not stupid Crais! I'm just a pain who wrecked your precious ship, you only did what you did to shut me up - you told me yourself!"  
  
"So now you assume that nothing that happened afterwards meant anything to me either," Crais said, getting angry himself although he didn't quite know why.  
  
"Why would it? Peacekeepers don't have feelings, they have 'recreation'. I'm sure it was an excellent way to unwind after all those hours you were stuck with me!"  
  
"I am not a Peacekeeper anymore!" Crais roared. "I admit I kissed you to make you stop crying but everything else happened because I wanted it, and I thought that you did too, you were the one who offered it! What did you do that for if you didn't?"  
  
To his surprise, he got no reply. He noticed her hair had faded back to its usual colour. She seemed subdued, a long way from the anger he'd seen microts ago.  
  
"Jool," he said quietly. "I am sorry if I gave you the impression that it meant nothing to me. I found myself a little...uncertain...of how I should proceed. I was a Peacekeeper for a long time, this is largely...uncharted territories for me."  
  
"I felt the same way," she answered softly. "I didn't know what to say."  
  
"Have I made myself clear?"  
  
"I think so," she said, a mischievous glint appearing in her eye, "we've talked enough."  
  
She caught a glimpse of the smile on Crais' face right before he kissed her.  
  
"I guess you guys have been in there long enough."  
  
They both jumped at the voice. They broke apart. Crichton was standing there grinning.  
  
"You've actually come to get us out?" Jool said.  
  
Crais found the whole situation rather more suspicious.  
  
"We're just going to be allowed to leave?"  
  
"Yup. Me and Aeryn sorted it all out."  
  
"I thought you and Officer Sun were doing maintenance on Moya."  
  
Crichton's grin got wider.  
  
"You set us up!" Crais said.  
  
"Yup."  
  
"You interfered in my...our...personal lives without our permission."  
  
"Yup."  
  
Crichton came over and unlocked the cage. Crais and Jool walked out. They headed back to the transport pod. When they reached it, Jool climbed in. Crichton moved to follow her, but Crais grabbed his arm.  
  
"Do not ever do that again," he said. "But...thank you."  
  
Then he climbed aboard before Crichton had a chance to say anything else.  
  
Crichton burst out laughing.  
  
"I am the king!" he yelled. 


	2. Next Time

'Next Time'  
  
  
This was the single most embarrassing moment of Bialar Crais' life. If he'd ever been asked to name the ten situations he'd least like to be in, this one would never have figured on it - it was too horrible to contemplate.  
  
At the very least, Crichton was making a valiant effort not to laugh.  
  
He was also trying not to look at Crais. He couldn't look at his face, because then he'd never be able to keep from laughing. And he couldn't look anywhere else because...well, he just couldn't. But not looking at him made it very difficult to do the job he was here for. There was a certain art to picking locks, and it did involve careful concentration. Especially if those locks happened to be attached to handcuffs.  
  
"So," Crichton said, trying to improve the situation, "do you have any idea what you might have done to make her so mad?"  
  
"No," Crais said, through gritted teeth. "I have not."  
  
"It seems a little...out of character."  
  
"Indeed."  
  
"You must have said or done *something*. She wouldn't just leave you...like this."  
  
Crais thought back over their earlier conversation.  
  
"I remember nothing."  
  
"What were you talking about?"  
  
"I would rather not discuss personal matters," Crais answered, in a futile attempt to retain some dignity.  
  
"Fair enough," Crichton said, "but if you don't figure out what you did wrong, what's to prevent this happening again?"  
  
A look of horror Scorpius would have been proud to create flashed across Crais' face at the thought of going through this a second time.  
  
"We were discussing how we met."  
  
"When you tried to strangle her and she stabbed you in the leg."  
  
"She wanted to hear about my first impressions of her," Crais continued, ignoring Crichton's last remark.  
  
"And you told her...what?"  
  
"The truth."  
  
Crichton closed his eyes.  
  
"Which would be?" he asked, beginning to understand the situation.  
  
"That when I first met her I thought she was little more than a spoilt child. And that, at the time, I was chiefly concerned with...."  
  
"Aeryn."  
  
"I assure you, that is in the past."  
  
"You actually told her that?" Crichton asked, torn between total disbelief and the overpowering desire to laugh. Fortunately he knew Crais well enough to realise that that would be suicide.  
  
"Of course," Crais said. Crichton was wearing his 'humans are superior' expression. He *hated* that expression.  
  
Crichton finally succeeded in undoing the cuffs and threw Crais' jacket and pants at him. Crais pulled them on as quickly as he could, hoping to get Crichton out of his quarters and escape any more humiliation.  
  
"Why on Earth did you do that?"  
  
"She asked me for my honest opinion."  
  
The battle against laughter was lost.  
  
"Can I give you some advice?" Crichton asked, trying to stop his shoulders shaking.  
  
"If you must," Crais answered, his pride thoroughly affronted and not feeling in a position to refuse.  
  
"When a woman says 'be honest', what she means is 'tell me what I want to hear'."  
  
"I find that extremely hard to believe."  
  
"It's true."  
  
"I do not think that Officer Sun would respond that way."  
  
"There's an exception to every rule and Aeryn's the exception. But she's not the issue. Jool is the issue and, believe me, the rule applies to her."  
  
"How can you be certain of that?"  
  
"Have you forgotten why I'm here?"  
  
Crais' eye caught the cuffs lying on his desk.  
  
"Since you seem to know so much about this, perhaps you could suggest how to repair the damage."  
  
"You're actually asking my advice?"  
  
Crais eyed the handcuffs again.  
  
"It may be necessary for my survival." He replied.  
  
***  
  
Jool was in the medilab, working on some unknown project. Or, honestly, not working at all. She was pretending to be working. What she really wanted to do was sit in a corner and howl. Did that mean she was the spoiled brat that Crais thought she was? When he'd first said that, she'd got angry and she'd wanted to hurt him for saying such a mean thing. Now she just felt hurt and ashamed. Hurt because of what he had said and ashamed over what she had done. He'd probably never speak to her again.  
  
She knew that when she'd arrived on Moya she hadn't been well liked. The one person she'd believed could like her was D'Argo. But she wasn't blind enough not to see that he still longed for Chiana, whatever had passed between them. At first, she'd thought this could change, but it hadn't. She'd been miserable. Far from home, her family dead and in a world of violence and fear that would have been beyond her comprehension before she came here. The others hadn't hidden their idea of her as a child. She hadn't been one in her world. She'd tried to find her feet, she knew her skill as a medic gave her some standing at least, but she'd been more unhappy than she'd ever believed she could be.  
  
And then...Crais.  
  
They hadn't got off to the best start, it was true. She'd had a good look at him while he was unconscious and couldn't deny that he was handsome. But all thoughts of that nature had flown out of her head when, upon waking, he'd nearly killed her by strangulation. But probably any of the others would have done the same thing if they'd woken up and seen a strange face looming over them - especially if they'd just escaped an attack. Gradually she'd come to realise that they had something in common. They were the outsiders. She was new to Moya and unused to their lifestyle, he was an old enemy and not yet trusted. She'd made tentative attempts to get to know him and everyone knew how that had worked out. And then Crichton had happened.  
  
And now this.  
  
She'd overreacted, she knew that. She had asked him to be honest. Wasn't honesty a good quality? She would have to apologise. He must be furious, she thought. Maybe I should just give him a little time to cool down.  
  
***  
  
He had to apologise. He'd rather walk on hot coals. Apologising meant admitting that he had been wrong. Crais liked to be right. He wasn't so sure that he hadn't been. But it seemed that his right action had been in the wrong situation. She must be angry with him, he hadn't seen her for two solar days. More times than he could count, he'd started towards her quarters. More times than he could count, he'd stopped before he'd taken more than a couple of steps. It was ridiculous to be scared, he wasn't scared, merely...apprehensive. Yes, that was it. Apprehensive enough to consider jumping ship.  
  
Crais approached the door of her quarters. They opened at his command.  
  
Jool wasn't there.  
  
Crais looked around him. Jool's quarters were full of things she had got at the last commerce planet they'd visited. She'd added a certain amount of luxury. The kind she missed being here. There were also several boxes full of infochips. She'd taken to collecting whatever scientific information she could find, it was her way of trying to be useful.  
  
He'd spent quite a bit of time here recently, so it didn't seem strange for him to be here without her. Having got this far, he decided to wait for a while. He settled himself at the table in the corner and looked idly at an information pad. It turned out to be very interesting. He forgot where he was after a while and didn't hear the door when it opened.  
  
Jool had had a terrible day. At first she had thought it best to give him some space, but it had been two solar days and he hadn't even been in the same room as her. She'd had another fight with Chiana, even though she had no real idea what it had been about, she couldn't find the infochip she needed for her work and she'd been thrown against the wall when Moya had accelerated and her arm was killing her. This was the point where her new outlook deserted her. All she wanted to do was curl up in bed and cry.   
  
Crais heard the sniffing, looked up and got a shock. She hadn't seen him. She was here and she looked more miserable than he'd ever seen her. And at least part of that must be his fault. He wanted to comfort her, but didn't have the slightest idea how. Considering how she felt about him at the moment, seeing him was likely to make her even more upset. Still, he couldn't just sit here and he couldn't leave without her noticing. So he would have to try.  
  
Jool heard the footsteps a microt before he reached her. A moment of panic gripped her. Without thinking, she turned and lashed wildly at the figure. She heard a surprised yell. She looked at the figure on the floor and gasped. If he hadn't been furious with her before, he must be now! But then, if he still hated her, why was he here? It didn't make sense. Unless...he had come to apologise.  
  
"Bialar!" she said, slapping his face in an attempt to wake him up.  
  
His eyelids flickered and he came round.  
  
"I was afraid you'd want to kill me," he said. "It seems that I was correct."  
  
"I didn't know it was you," she said, feeling very foolish.  
  
"I came to...apologise."  
  
"I should apologise too."  
  
"I realise now that I could have been more...tactful."  
  
"Next time I won't tell you to be honest unless I mean it."  
  
"Next time?" Crais asked, hope beginning to appear.  
  
She smiled shyly.  
  
"Next time," she answered. 


	3. Two Sides

'Two Sides'  
  
  
Crais was in a good mood. A really good mood. It was a strange experience. He wasn't sure he could ever remember feeling like this before. The food cubes he'd had for breakfast had actually tasted good. Far more disturbing than that, this morning Crichton had told a joke and Crais had smiled. That had certainly never happened before. Something must be wrong with him.  
  
It was funny really, Jool thought. Surely, becoming involved with the other 'outsider' on Moya should make her less a part of the crew, not more. But, for some reason she couldn't quite understand, Crichton seemed to like both of them more now. He called them 'cute'. This made Crais angry. That made Crichton laugh. Then Aeryn had to step in. That made her angry, but the fights never seemed to last long. All in all, a lot seemed to have changed for the better.  
  
Crichton was loving every minute of it. Since he had been the cupid who had got them together in the first place, he was naturally interested to see what would happen. Crais, he knew, was trying as hard as possible to prevent Crichton knowing anything. Somehow he was still under the illusion that his private life could be kept private. He didn't seem to have realised that, on Moya, everyone knew everything sooner or later.   
  
If only that was all still true.  
  
Crais couldn't believe that it was all over. It had barely begun. Just when he'd got used to having her there she was taken away. No, she hadn't been taken away, she'd chosen to leave. A chance to get back the life she'd always wanted. Why would she have stayed? What did he have to offer that compared? A life filled with uncertainty, on the run, not even sure what the next arn would bring. Who would choose that?  
  
He should have seen it as soon as they arrived. The way everyone on that planet looked at her, like she was someone special. He hadn't seen it, he'd been blind. He'd known that Interions were prised intellectuals, but he'd had no idea the offer was coming until it was made. They, the 'Klivocians', wanted her to stay. To be the head of their university medical department no less. And she'd accepted of course. She would have everything she'd left behind - a comfortable home, a secure life. Everything he couldn't offer her.  
  
They'd moved on since then. They'd visited several planets, travelled thousands of metras. He should have just forgotten her and moved on. But, for some reason, he couldn't.  
  
***  
  
Jool was sitting in the window seat of her home, looking out at the view. Mountains and shining sunlight. She had everything she'd ever wanted and more. A chance to really use her knowledge, and to be respected as an authority instead of dismissed as an innocent. She was good at her job and the people here had been nothing but welcoming. But something was still missing.   
  
The truth was, she was unhappy. Not the unhappiness she'd felt when she first woke up on Moya. That had been general, this was specific. The kind of unhappiness that comes when you know exactly what is wrong, but can't do anything about it. What was wrong was the events that had led her here. When she'd received the offer, she'd intended to turn it down. But then she'd told Crais about it.  
  
"They want me to stay - permanently."  
  
"They what?" Crais said.  
  
"They want me to be head of the medical department."  
  
"That sounds like a wonderful opportunity," he said.  
  
Jool felt as if he'd winded her. She'd thought he would ask her to stay. It sounded like he didn't even care if she went. It sounded like he even wanted her to. She'd been planning to stay with him, but if he didn't even care.... It was a wonderful opportunity. So, she'd take it.  
  
Jool could still hear him saying those words. All the time they'd spent together must have been a lie. He'd didn't even care enough to want her to stay with him. So she should forget him and move on. So why couldn't she?  
  
***  
  
Crais remembered the day she'd told him.  
  
"They want me to be the head of their medical department," she said.  
  
Crais felt as if the floor had disappeared and he was falling. She sounded as if she wanted to take it. Of course she did. This was her dream, to get off the ship and return to the life she'd known before. A part of him, one that he'd never thought existed before, wanted to get down on his knees and beg her to stay. But he couldn't do that. He couldn't admit feeling like that.  
  
"That sounds like a wonderful opportunity," he said, feeling dead inside.  
  
And she'd gone.   
  
And he missed her.  
  
And he was miserable without her.  
  
***  
  
Jool had come to a decision. She couldn't stay here. Probably she was being stupid. Probably, when she found Moya, he'd just laugh. But she had to know. So she had to swallow her pride, and her fear, and go back. She'd resigned her post and made arrangements to find transport. She wasn't sure quite how she was going to find them, but she'd manage it somehow. The few things she was taking with her were packed and she was leaving tomorrow.  
  
She had just settled down with an infopad when someone knocked on the door. She went to answer it. She opened the door.  
  
And that was the last thing she knew.  
  
***  
  
"Crais," Aeryn said, walking into Talyn's command.  
  
"Yes, Officer Sun, what is it?" he was standing looking out of the viewscreen like he'd been for most of the last arn.  
  
"I have come to give you an order."  
  
"An order Officer Sun?" Crais said, feeling like that should bother him.  
  
"Yes," she said, "an order."  
  
"And what is this 'order' precisely?"  
  
"To return to the planet where we left Jool."  
  
Crais was taken aback.   
  
"Why would I wish to do that?"  
  
"Don't you think we've seen how you've been acting since she left."  
  
"How is that?"  
  
"Frelling miserable. You never talk, you never come over to Moya. You can't honestly think we wouldn't notice."  
  
"I wasn't aware that you had any interest in my behaviour."  
  
"Don't try to change the subject. All I can see is, you don't seem to be able to function without her. So either forget it, or go back and stay with her."  
  
"I never thought you would say something like that."  
  
"A lot's changed in my life since my Peacekeeper days. I've come to realise that sometimes you have to give in to sentiment."  
  
"However that may be, she made it quite clear that she preferred to leave. I see no point in further action."  
  
"Did you even ask her to stay?"  
  
"Why would that be necessary? She must...she must have known that I wanted her to," Crais finished quietly.  
  
"She probably did," Aeryn said, "but that doesn't necessarily mean that she didn't need to hear it."  
  
With that she walked out.  
  
Crais' head was full of jumbled thoughts. He would have expected those words from Crichton, but from Officer Sun.... Perhaps she was right. His behaviour had been erratic, illogical. For his own safety, and that of his ship, he should try to remove the cause of this. It was the only sensible course of action.  
  
***  
  
When Jool woke up, she was strapped into a chair. Her wrists, waist and ankles were immobile.   
  
"Good morning," said a voice, "I trust you had a pleasant sleep."  
  
She recognised the man as the head of the government.  
  
"What the hezmana have you done to me?!"  
  
"It's quite simple really." He approached her side. "You attempted to leave the planet, did you not?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"I prevented you from doing so."  
  
"I'm a prisoner here?"  
  
"No, not a prisoner, a guest. A...permanent...guest."  
  
"Why did you go to the trouble of asking me to stay?"  
  
"If you were willing to stay my job would be much easier. Unfortunately, now you desire to leave, I'm afraid more...drastic...measures had to be taken."  
  
"You can't force me to stay like this. I'm no use to you locked up."  
  
"Actually...that is not exactly true."  
  
He paused, Jool waited with mounting apprehension.  
  
"It is true you are no use as a professor in your current situation, but if you insist on fighting us there are...other measures...than can be taken."  
  
Fear built every second.  
  
"I am reliably informed," he said, "that there is substantial profit to be made trading Interion body parts."  
  
Jool's scream melted the walls.  
  
***  
  
Crais couldn't keep still. The journey was a long one. He'd already done every conceivable maintenance check and systems overhaul. It was ridiculous that this should affect him in this way. He had faced countless battles and challenges, he had been tortured to within an dench of his life in the Aurora chair, and yet the prospect of having to admit emotional weakness terrified him more than anything he had faced in his life. That, of all his training, was the hardest to let go of. It had been drummed into him every day of his life since he was conscripted. More than once he'd considered turning Talyn around and heading back. Unfortunately, that was no longer an option. Officer Sun had finally informed him that, if he did not return with Jool, then he could not return at all. Strangely, all the crew seemed to agree. The question was, what would happen if she wouldn't come back with him? He was surprised to find that he wanted to return to Moya when this was over. The others seemed to think she would come willingly, Crais was far less optimistic.  
  
When he finally arrived at the planet, he found the authorities rather less than co-operative. He began to feel suspicious.  
  
"Joolushko Tunai Fenta Hovalis, professor of medicine at your national academy."  
  
"My records do not contain anyone by that name."  
  
"I find it extremely hard to believe that the only Interion on this planet is not listed."  
  
"We have many different species on this planet, including a number of Interions."  
  
That surprised Crais, he didn't recall ever seeing any non-Klivocians when he was on the surface.  
  
***  
  
Jool was thrown into the room.   
  
"I suggest you think about your choice. It isn't hard to decide."  
  
Free of her chains, Jool looked around. The room was poorly lit, but she could make out a series of what looked like cryogenic pods all around the walls. She moved to the nearest one and, trembling, wiped away the condensation from the screen. In it was an Interion. She wiped the others. Another Interion, one Halation and several others she didn't recognise. All strapped in, all missing body parts.  
  
And all conscious.  
  
Jool's scream echoed round the room.  
  
***  
  
Crais had finally ended up at the academy. Now he knew something was wrong. Jool was in trouble, without a doubt and that meant he had to find her.  
  
"It is not possible that you do not know a Joolushko Hovalis! She works for you and if you do not tell me where she is I will personally break every body part I can get my hands on!"  
  
He had the man by his neck. He'd thought once that this side of himself was under control. He didn't want to kill again, unless it was in self-defence. Nevertheless, at this moment he would be willing to kill everyone in sight if it meant he would find Jool.  
  
"She's...at...the...medical...centre," the man gasped.  
  
"And where is that?"  
  
"The...basement."  
  
"Thank you," Crais said, and left, leaving the man coughing and clutching his throat.  
  
They didn't seem to have prepared for a break out. He saw no guards at all on his way down. That could, of course, mean he was walking (or rather running) straight into a trap, but it made no difference to Crais. His mission was the same, no matter what the situation.  
  
He found himself running through corridors until he came to a locked door. It all seemed too easy. He grabbed his pulse pistol and aimed it at the lock. It broke easily and he opened the door.   
  
Jool wasn't there. Before he could react, he was jumped from both sides. He fought as hard as he could, but there were too many of them and he was overpowered.  
  
Someone stepped calmly out of the shadows.  
  
"We do not usually keep Sebaceans," the man said, "they are of limited use and profit is minimal."  
  
He came closer and studied Crais's face for a moment.  
  
"But every little bit helps," he said.  
  
One of his captors knocked him out.  
  
When he awoke he was in another room, strapped to a chair. No one else was there - except Jool.  
  
She was strapped into an identical chair opposite him.  
  
"Bialar, are you awake? What are you doing here?" Jool asked, very confused.  
  
"I came to rescue you," Crais said, feeling rather silly. "It did not go quite as I intended."  
  
"Yes, but...why did you come back here?" Jool asked, conscious that she was holding her breath.  
  
Maybe it was being strapped down so he couldn't escape, maybe it was facing having his body parts cut off and sold, maybe it was nothing, but that question suddenly seemed much easier to answer.  
  
"To find you," he said. "And...to ask you to come back with me."  
  
She couldn't resist one more prod.  
  
"Why would you want me to be with you?" she asked, not sure of the answer she would get.  
  
"Because I love you," Crais said, without even stopping to think. Only after the words had left his mouth did he realise what he'd just said. In all the time they'd spent together, he'd never once said those words. And now he'd said them without a moment's hesitation. Nothing he'd ever done had surprised him quite as much.  
  
Jool shared this reaction. Her mouth had fallen open at Crais's words and she still hadn't gathered herself enough to close it.  
  
Suddenly, she began to laugh.  
  
Being laughed at was not an experience Crais enjoyed, especially not after what he'd just said.   
  
"What, may I ask, is so amusing?" he said tensely, feeling humiliated.  
  
Jool was laughing too much to answer straight away.  
  
"It's just, we had all that time on Moya and Talyn," she said, when she'd gathered herself. "There must have been a thousand times you could have said that. And you wait until we're tied up, about to have our organs harvested! Was it really that difficult to say?"  
  
Crais had to admit she was right. The situation was ridiculous.   
  
"I came to rescue you and I will," he said, trying to be serious.  
  
"You know, that would mean more if you weren't tied up too."  
  
"There must be some way out."  
  
Crais found himself looking at his bonds. They looked suspiciously like...metal.  
  
"Jool," he said. "Scream."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Scream. My bonds are made of metal. They should melt."  
  
"I can't scream just like that."  
  
"You're imprisoned. Your only hope of rescue is tied up opposite you. You are about to have your internal organs cut up and sold on the black market. Surely, that is enough to scare you."  
  
"To scare me, yes, but not to make me scream."  
  
Crais sighed.  
  
"Jool," he said. "As it happens, there is a rather large frinaar spider right next to your left ear."  
  
Jool's scream was of pure terror.  
  
Crais' bonds melted enough for him to break them. He hurriedly tried to undo hers.  
  
"Now we have to get back to Talyn."  
  
Jool hesitated.  
  
"In case we don't," she said, "I...love you too."  
  
Years of training at hiding his feelings didn't stop the smile spreading over Crais' face.  
  
***  
  
A lifetime later, Jool was on Talyn's bridge, a smile a metra wide on her face. They would be back to Moya soon. For some reason she couldn't quite fathom, being there didn't seem as bad as it had before. If it was the hell she had imagined it to be when she first arrived, then there were definite perks involved in being a bad girl.  
  
She heard the doors open behind her and a few microts later felt Crais' hands on her shoulders.   
  
"We should reach the meeting co-ordinates in just over two arns," he said.  
  
She didn't turn around. A wicked glint appeared, unseen, in her eyes.  
  
"What shall we do until then?" she asked innocently. 


	4. Child's Play

'Child's Play'  
  
  
"Me?! Why do I have to look after it?"  
  
"Jool, someone needs to look after it while we check out the rest of the ship. Just hold it, that's all."  
  
Jool gave Crichton an exasperated look.  
  
"What if it starts crying? What am I supposed to do then?"  
  
"Don't tell me you've never held a baby before?"  
  
"Well, yes, but...."  
  
"Great, you've done it before, you can do it again. Take it back to the pod and wait for us there."  
  
He strode out. Jool looked at the bundle in her arms. The child appeared Sebacean and it couldn't have been more than half a cycle old.  
  
"At least you're asleep," Jool told it, as she headed back towards the pod.  
  
***  
  
D'Argo and Crais were alone in Moya's command, waiting for Crichton, Aeryn and Jool to return from the derelict ship. The atmosphere was slightly strained. Crais suspected that he would never be anything to the Luxan except the Peacekeeper Captain who had held him captive. He assumed that was why D'Argo had not spoken a word to him.   
  
In fact, he was wrong. D'Argo's silence had nothing to do with Crais. He was recalling a conversation he had had with Crichton earlier that day. He had been thinking about his son a lot lately, but more than that he had been thinking about the future.  
  
"John," he had said, "before you came to Moya, did you intend to have children?"  
  
"I always figured I would, yeah. Why, what's up D?"  
  
"Do you remember when we were on the Royal Planet?"  
  
"How could I forget?" Crichton said, the memory of the daughter he would never know was still fresh in his mind.  
  
"Chiana and I took the DNA test. Our DNA is not compatible."  
  
"So you guys would never be able to have kids," Crichton said, sitting down beside him.  
  
"At the time I told myself that it did not matter as I already had a son. But lately I have been thinking that I would like to have another child some day. But that would mean...."  
  
"That you'd have to give up Chiana."  
  
"Yes. And I do not know if I could do that."  
  
"Could you guys maybe adopt a baby from somewhere?"  
  
"Perhaps. But I have come to suspect that Chiana does not feel the same way about this as I do."  
  
"She's still pretty young, D'Argo. Maybe in a few years she'll feel differently."  
  
"Maybe, but what do I do if she doesn't?"  
  
Crichton had got up and patted him on the shoulder.  
  
"Wish I could tell you D," he'd said.  
  
"Crais?" D'Argo said.  
  
"Yes, Ka D'Argo, what is it?" Crais replied.  
  
"When you were a Peacekeeper, did you ever take part in the genetic birthing program?"  
  
Crais was very surprised by the question and not too pleased. It brought back some unwanted memories.  
  
"I did," he said.  
  
"Did you ever consider meeting your child?"  
  
"As a matter of fact," Crais said, not meeting D'Argo's eyes, "the child did not survive."  
  
"If it had survived, would you have considered it?"  
  
"Such an action would have been against regulation. However, I did find myself...curious...about it."  
  
D'Argo grunted and lapsed into silence once again. Crais wasn't sure what to make of the conversation. He couldn't recall D'Argo ever asking about his life before and he had no idea why this should be of interest to him. The feelings associated with the memories also unsettled him. He began to wish that they had stuck to silence.  
  
***  
  
"It's a cute little thing," Chiana said, peeking at the bundle. "For a Sebacean anyway."  
  
"You take it then," Jool said, stuffing the bundle into Chiana's arms.  
  
"Why should I have to take it?"  
  
"Crichton wants me to run tests on it to make sure it's not sick. I can't do that and hold it at the same time," Jool said, going over to the work bench.  
  
"Well, it looks healthy to me."  
  
"That's your expert opinion is it?"  
  
"Are you calling me stupid?"  
  
"Not if you're going to do it for me."  
  
The baby woke up and began to cry at the loud voices. Jool and Chiana shared a panicked look.  
  
"Make it stop," Chiana said.  
  
"Me? I don't know how to make it stop!"  
  
"You must have some idea!"  
  
"Maybe we could try...feeding it," Jool said desperately.  
  
"With what, dried food cubes?"  
  
"We need something liquid."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"I don't know!"  
  
Chiana smelt something.  
  
"Maybe it doesn't need feeding, maybe it needs something else."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
The smell reached Jool's nose as well. They shared a disgusted look.  
  
"What do we do now?" Chiana asked.  
  
***  
  
"John!" D'Argo said, rather glad not to be alone with Crais anymore. "What did you find?"  
  
"Not much, I reckon a few people got there before us. We found some narium coils, but that was about it on the spare parts front."  
  
"Nothing else?"  
  
"I think we got us a new crewmember."  
  
"What?!" D'Argo exclaimed.   
  
"That ship was a Peacekeeper ship, we may have to think carefully about trusting any survivors," Crais said.  
  
"Sort of a case of the pot calling the kettle black, isn't it Crais? Besides, with this particular one, betrayal is going to be the least of our problems."  
  
"Meaning what?" Crais asked suspiciously.  
  
Instead of answering, Crichton accessed his comms.  
  
"Jool, how's it going?"  
  
He heard sounds of splashing.  
  
"Not so good," Jool said. "Chiana nearly drowned him."  
  
"I did not!" Chiana said, outraged. "You were the one who nearly dropped him!"  
  
"No, I was giving him to you. If you had been paying attention, it wouldn't have happened."  
  
"If you had warned me first then...."  
  
Crichton closed the comm line.  
  
"I think we may need to do some damage control down there."  
  
"Crichton, what precisely is happening?" Crais said, more confused than ever.  
  
"We found a baby on the ship. We couldn't find any other survivors but there was a body not far from it that was probably its mother. It looked like she'd died pretty recently."  
  
"Then there may well be Peacekeepers in the area," Crais replied.  
  
"I don't think so. The woman was a Peacekeeper Officer. If Peacekeepers had come to check it out they would've taken her with them."  
  
"That still means that someone must have boarded the ship recently," D'Argo said.  
  
"I don't think so," Crichton said, shaking his head. "Jool checked her out. She died of natural causes. Best guess, their food supplies ran out."  
  
"So we now have a child on board?" D'Argo asked.  
  
"Yeah, although if I don't get down there fast they may end up killing him," Crichton replied with a grin.  
  
"I will go with you," D'Argo said immediately.  
  
"Crais, you coming?"  
  
"This is not really my area of expertise."  
  
"Maybe not, but you can help keep Jool from killing Chiana."  
  
***  
  
"I've managed to find some bed sheets. What is it that you want them for?" Aeryn said, as she entered the medilab.  
  
"Diapers," Crichton replied. "Pass me the scissors Jool."  
  
"You're going to put those on him?" Jool said.  
  
"It's not like I can just run down to Mothercare. This is the best that I can come up with."  
  
"Fine, you do it then."  
  
"What exactly are we going to feed it?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"There's a commerce planet a day from here, we'll have to find some supplies there." Crichton replied.  
  
"And until then I suppose you intend to feed it food cubes."  
  
"No, we'll just have to improvise."  
  
"Who's going to take care of it?"  
  
"I am not doing it!" Jool said. "It's bad enough having to bath him!"  
  
"Don't look at me John," Aeryn said.  
  
"I will take care of it," D'Argo said.  
  
"D'Argo," Chiana said, "are you sure about this?"  
  
"You do not have to assist me unless you want to."   
  
Chiana looked uncertain.  
  
"Well maybe I want to," she said  
  
"You!" Jool said. "He won't last an arn."  
  
"Oh, like you're any better!" Chiana snapped back.  
  
"I suggest I take him out before he wakes up," D'Argo said.  
  
"Great idea. Chiana, are you going with him?" Crichton said.  
  
"Yeah," she said, "I am. It's not that hard."  
  
She left with D'Argo...and pretended not to hear Jool's snort.  
  
***  
  
The child had now been on board for more than thirty solar days. It felt like much longer. It was amazing how quickly they'd adapted, even though every routine had been turned upside down. The biggest argument had been over what they would name him, since they didn't know what name he had been given. D'Argo had, of course, wanted to give him a Luxan name, Crichton wanted to name him after his father, Chiana had suggested Nerri after her brother. This argument had finally been finished by Aeryn who said that, since the child was Sebacean, he ought to have a Sebacean name. And, eventually, they'd decided on the last name they'd thought of. They named him Tauvo.   
  
Crais, who had kept out of the discussion, was both amazed and (although he hadn't admitted it) touched by this. No matter how strange it had been at first, it was wonderful to have his brother's name remembered in this way.  
  
***  
  
Jool was attempting to take care of Tauvo and run tests at the same time. It was not an easy task. But since everyone else had left them to fetch supplies from the commerce planet, she didn't have much of a choice. It might have been much easier if he had just gone to sleep. Unfortunately, he was very much awake and determined to claim her attention. She'd grown far more comfortable with him since he came on board, but that didn't make her job any easier. She finally gave up trying to work and picked him up. Maybe if she entertained him for a while, he might go to sleep.  
  
Crais chose that moment to come in. He was surprised at the sight. With the possible exception of Aeryn and himself, Jool was usually the most uncomfortable with Tauvo. D'Argo and Crichton both adored children and Chiana had proved to have a talent for entertaining him, while Aeryn and Jool rarely spent time alone with him. Crais himself had always kept his distance. Caring for children was not something he had much experience in. It was one thing with Talyn, but a Sebacean child was an entirely different proposition. Besides, he suspected that D'Argo would not appreciate his interference.  
  
Jool saw him.  
  
"Great," she said. "You can help me take care of him while I work."  
  
Crais found the baby stuffed into his arms. He held Tauvo as if he were made of glass.  
  
"I believe you would be a better choice," he said.  
  
"I don't know any more about children than you do. Just hold him for a few minutes."  
  
Crais had never been so tense. He eyed the child in his arms rather as if he was a bomb who might go off at any moment. After a while though, he slowly began to relax. Nothing bad seemed to have happened. He cautiously touched the baby's cheek. Tauvo smiled and blew bubbles. Despite himself, Crais found a smile on his face. Tauvo reached out determinedly, grabbed one of Crais' fingers and held tight. For the first time, Crais began to feel as if this was an experience he could get to like.  
  
He didn't realise straight away that Jool was watching him. When he finally looked up, he couldn't read the expression on her face.  
  
"I didn't think you liked children," she said.  
  
"I was never given the opportunity to find out," Crais said. "And I did not expect to have the chance to raise my offspring."  
  
"What about now?" She said.   
  
"I...have never given it much thought," Crais said, honestly.  
  
He still couldn't read the expression on her face.  
  
"Well maybe you should," Jool said.  
  
"Why?" Crais asked. Something told him that there was more to this conversation than casual enquiry.  
  
"No reason," Jool said, avoiding his gaze.  
  
"I rather suspect," Crais said, "that there is a reason."  
  
"Maybe I was just curious," Jool said. "So I'd know, for the future."  
  
"The future of what?" Crais asked.  
  
"Just...the future," Jool replied.  
  
***  
  
"Why is it such a strange idea?" D'Argo asked.  
  
"Because...it just is," Chiana replied, more than a little flustered.  
  
"I thought you enjoyed taking care of him."  
  
"Well...I do," she said, "but...it wouldn't be the same if I had to."  
  
"You're very good with him."  
  
"Well...well thanks...but, D'Argo I don't want...."  
  
"You don't want what?"  
  
"I don't want...to be a mother. At least, not yet. I'm...I'm young D'Argo...I don't want it yet."  
  
"At least you are being honest," D'Argo said. "Do you think you will change your mind later?"  
  
"Yeah...maybe...I'm not sure," Chiana said.  
  
"I suppose we'll just have to wait and see," D'Argo said.  
  
"Yeah, wait and see," Chiana replied uneasily.  
  
***  
  
"You really enjoy taking care of him, don't you?" Aeryn said, watching Crichton feeding Tauvo.  
  
"I've always liked children," he replied. "You don't seem to feel the same way."  
  
She came to sit beside him.  
  
"It's not that I don't like him," she said. "I've just never been around children before."  
  
"Well, now's your chance."  
  
They were both silent for a moment.  
  
"You know, John, that sooner or later we will have to leave him somewhere."  
  
"Yeah, I know."  
  
"This is not exactly an ideal place to raise a child."  
  
"Has Pilot found anything yet?"  
  
"He's been scanning for Sebacean planets, but nothing so far."  
  
"Then you have the time to get used to him." Crichton said, placing Tauvo in Aeryn's arms. Aeryn held him gingerly.  
  
"What should I do with him?" she asked.  
  
"Just support him with one arm and feed him with the other."  
  
Crichton watched Aeryn concentrating on Tauvo.  
  
"Have you ever thought about having children?" He asked.  
  
"Since I never expected to raise them, it didn't seem to matter," she replied.  
  
"What about that genetic birthing thing, did you ever have one of them?"  
  
"I did have one, yes."  
  
"Really?" Crichton asked. "Didn't you ever try to find out anything about it?"  
  
"He didn't survive," Aeryn said flatly.   
  
"What about the father?"  
  
"What about him?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"Well, who was he, maybe?"  
  
"I don't know," Aeryn said.  
  
"Whoa, stop, you don't know? How can you not know?"  
  
"I was impregnated in a lab with his DNA, I have no idea who he was."  
  
"But it must have been on your record."  
  
"Peacekeeper Officers do not have access to their own personnel files. And there was no reason for me to know."  
  
"Weren't you even curious?"  
  
"The chances that it was someone I knew were minuscule. There seemed no reason to know. But, perhaps, if the child had survived, I would have wanted to find out."  
  
Crichton was silent, trying to absorb all this.  
  
"What about now?" he asked, rather fearing what the answer would be. "Would you consider having them now?"  
  
Aeryn was quiet for a moment.  
  
"Maybe," she said.  
  
That seemed to be the best he was going to get.  
  
***  
  
"Okay Pilot, we're here, what is it?" Crichton asked.  
  
"Moya and I have located a planet that appears to have large numbers of Sebacean lifesigns on it."  
  
Crichton and D'Argo shared a look.  
  
"I guess this is where we part company," Crichton said.  
  
"I wish I could keep him here."  
  
"Yeah, I know, but it's better for him to have a safer life down there than to be on the run with us."  
  
"Somehow, knowing that does not make me feel better."  
  
"We're all going to miss him, D."  
  
"Except maybe Rygel."  
  
Their laugh was almost convincing.  
  
***  
  
"You don't think it strange that they have made no contact with us?" D'Argo said.  
  
"Pilot said that it looks like a rural planet. They probably don't have that kind of technology," Crichton said.  
  
"Or they don't want to be disturbed."  
  
"We'll have to take that risk."  
  
"You are certain that you don't wish me to come with you?"  
  
"If it is a rural planet they're probably not that used to off-worlders. I figure we'll blend in better if it's just me, Aeryn and Crais. Once we've got things sorted we'll bring everyone down."  
  
"At the slightest hint of trouble, call Moya for help."  
  
"Don't worry D'Argo, we will."  
  
***  
  
"Peacekeepers!" The child's scream rang out. Her mother quickly pulled her inside.  
  
They were in a small village, farms were visible in the distance all around and fields filled every gap. Crais couldn't help feeling that this place was somehow familiar to him. They looked around for someone to talk to, but everyone seemed to have disappeared. They approached something resembling a town hall. Their knock was answered.  
  
The man who answered seemed to age twenty cycles just by looking at them. He stood up.  
  
"I'll inform the people that you recruiters are here."  
  
"We're not Peacekeepers," Crichton said, suddenly understanding why everyone had vanished.   
  
"You sure look like them," he said, suspiciously.  
  
"We don't want to hurt you, we don't want to 'recruit' anybody, we just need your help."  
  
"With what?" The man said, slightly less suspiciously.  
  
"It will take some time to explain. May we come in?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"If you're not Peacekeepers then you're welcome here," the man said.  
  
They settled down in his office.  
  
"So, what is it that you need help with?"  
  
"On our travels, we came across a derelict ship. There was only one survivor, a young Sebacean child. We have been taking care of him on our ship, but we wish to find a suitable family for him here."  
  
"Where is this child?"  
  
"He is still on our ship. Our friends are taking care of him."  
  
The man regarded them.  
  
"Guess you must really not be Peacekeepers. I never heard a Peacekeeper call anyone a friend. But those are Peacekeeper uniforms."  
  
"The ship we are travelling on was once under Peacekeeper control," Crais said. "Myself and Officer Sun were both Peacekeepers, but no longer."  
  
"I didn't think Peacekeepers just let people go," the man said, his suspicion returning.  
  
"Crais and I were both declared irreversibly contaminated due to our contact with the others on Moya and were lucky enough to escape execution," Aeryn said.  
  
"Crais?" The man said.  
  
"I am Bialar Crais," Crais replied. "Aeryn Sun and John Crichton," he added, gesturing to the others.  
  
The man looked uneasy.  
  
"We've got someone by that name here. Don't suppose he's any relation though."  
  
The hairs on Crais's neck had begun to prickle, this all seemed like too much of a coincidence.  
  
"What is his name?" Crais asked.  
  
"Valen Crais."  
  
Crais went white.  
  
"Crais, what is it?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"That is my father's name," Crais said, hoarsely.  
  
"Is that possible?" Crichton asked.  
  
"I was born on a farming community like this one. It seems familiar to me. It could be possible."  
  
"I guess there's only one way to find out," Crichton said. "Where can we find him?"  
  
"The Crais farm is at the other end of the village, by the river. He'll most likely be there."  
  
"Let's go," Crichton said.  
  
"No!" Crais said. "We came here to deal with Tauvo."  
  
"Tauvo?" the man asked.  
  
"The child," Crais said.  
  
"Don't you even want to see if it is him?" Crichton asked.  
  
"Perhaps later," Crais replied.  
  
Crichton shrugged his shoulders.  
  
"Have it your way," he said.  
  
***  
  
Crais was alone, his mind in turmoil. In his wildest dreams, he'd never imagined that he'd see his father again. The prospect brought back all the feelings he'd tried so hard to forget. His resentment towards his father because he'd let them be taken by the recruiters, and his guilt over his failure to protect his brother. He couldn't face him. He would be sure to ask about Tauvo, and Crais would have to tell him the truth. That Tauvo was dead. That Crais had failed to protect him as he'd promised he would. That he was a failure.  
  
But, despite that, a part of him wanted to see if it really was his father. To go back to his childhood home. He would never have another chance in his life time, that was certain. But that meant risking the rejection that he feared. It was strange. He'd spent years being told that accidents of birth meant nothing, but it had never dissolved his love for his brother or his fear of his father. If anything, it had strengthened them.  
  
Where had the man said the farm was? Crais headed in the direction he had indicated and suddenly found that he remembered the way. It was an unsettling feeling, walking up the path he'd run up so many times as a child. He'd never dreamed he would walk here again. He could almost feel the ghosts of himself and Tauvo around him. It took all his strength to go on, but he would not give in to fear.  
  
There was an old man sitting outside the house. He had altered much over the cycles, but Crais knew him immediately. He did not seem to recognise Crais though, even as he came close to him.  
  
"There's no children here so you're wasting your time," the man said.  
  
"What?" Crais said.  
  
"I tell you recruiters every time you come up here. There's no children in this house."  
  
"I am not a recruiter," Crais said. "Or a Peacekeeper."  
  
The man looked him up and down.  
  
"You look like one to me."  
  
"I was a Peacekeeper," Crais said. "But I am one no longer."  
  
The man gave a bitter laugh.  
  
"No wonder they take all our children if they're letting people go!"  
  
"They did not *let* me go," Crais said. "I was fortunate enough to escape."  
  
"If you're not recruiting what do you want?" the man said.  
  
"I...used to live in this house," Crais said.  
  
The man snorted.  
  
"Don't be ridiculous. I've lived here all my life and I've never seen the likes of you before."  
  
"My name," Crais said, "is Bialar Crais."  
  
"Is this some sort of sick joke?!" the man said. "It's bad enough that you take my sons away from me, then you have to torture me as well! They are gone, you got what you wanted, now leave me alone!"  
  
"Father," Crais said. "I am not joking. I am Bialar Crais and I am your son."  
  
The man regarded him. He obviously did not believe Crais.  
  
"When you were young, what pet did you have?"  
  
"A Tarka lizard," Crais replied, without hesitation.  
  
The man shifted in his chair.  
  
"How did he die?"  
  
"He ate the poison you put down to kill the Greenash beetles."  
  
"No!" the man said forcefully. "You can't be him! It is not possible!"  
  
"But it is true."  
  
"You have really come back?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And Tauvo, is he with you?"  
  
This was the moment Crais had been dreading.  
  
"Tauvo is dead," he said.  
  
The man slumped in his chair.  
  
"When?"  
  
"More than three cycles ago."  
  
The man was silent. Crais had been expecting an explosion.  
  
"Are you not angry with me?" Crais asked, the silence was making him too uncomfortable.  
  
"What for?" the man asked.  
  
"I failed. I couldn't protect Tauvo. I was certain that you would be angry."  
  
The man gave a tired smile.  
  
"It's hard to care about anything that much any more. I lost both my sons, then my wife. It is enough that you have returned."  
  
"My mother?" Crais asked. "She is dead?"  
  
"For over thirty cycles," the man said. "It was a blessing she died."  
  
Crais was shocked by that. The man saw his expression and gave a wry smile.  
  
"Don't look like that. I meant it was a blessing for her. After the recruiters took you and Tauvo away she was never the same again."  
  
"You have lived alone here for all that time?"  
  
"I have hired men working the farm for me and Laili to look after the house."  
  
"Laili?"  
  
"Your cousin Laili. You won't remember her. She wasn't even born when you were taken away. She's the only one the recruiters haven't taken, too weak when she was young, she's grown out of it now though."  
  
"And my Aunt and Uncle?"  
  
"Both dead these ten cycles."  
  
Crais sat down and tried to absorb all he had heard. The fears he'd had that his father would reject him seemed groundless, but so much had happened since he was here last. His father seemed like a different man and everyone he knew seemed to be dead. The world he'd known was dead and gone.  
  
"What about you?" the man asked. "How long have you been out of the Peacekeepers?"  
  
"Over two cycles," Crais said.  
  
"What are you doing now?"  
  
"I live on board a leviathan with a group of escaped Peacekeeper prisoners."  
  
The man almost laughed.  
  
"A real step up," he said.  
  
"I have come to appreciate it."  
  
"What about a mate, offspring?"  
  
"I have no offspring. I have a mate, of sorts."  
  
"What's she like?"  
  
Crais found himself smiling.  
  
"Hard work," he said.  
  
The man managed a chuckle.   
  
"Will I get to meet her?" he asked.  
  
"If you wish it," Crais replied.  
  
***  
  
It ended up with almost the entire crew piled into the kitchen. Laili proved to be a very good natured woman who didn't object to six people invading and served food so good that even D'Argo considered snurching some to take back with them. She took to Tauvo immediately and, altogether, they thoroughly enjoyed themselves.  
  
Before they left, Laili asked to speak to them.  
  
"You say that you are looking for a family for him. Would you consider leaving him here with me?"  
  
"If we leave him with you, sooner or later he will be recruited," Aeryn said.  
  
"That would be true of any family here," she said. "I understand that you do not want him to be a Peacekeeper, but there is a risk of that wherever you leave him."  
  
"She's right," Crichton said. "From what I've heard here, the recruiters come round every few cycles. The community is almost dying out."  
  
"And every Sebacean planet like it is the same," D'Argo said.  
  
"At least I can give him a good life until then," she said. "But it is your decision."  
  
"Could we have a moment alone?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"Of course," Laili replied and went outside.  
  
"Are we going to condemn him to life as a Peacekeeper?" D'Argo asked.  
  
"I don't like it either D'Argo, but I think this is as good as we can do," Crichton said. "Wherever we leave him they'll probably pick him up, at least here he can have a good start in life."  
  
"What if we kept him with us?" Chiana said.  
  
"And the next time Scorpius catches up with us, he gets killed? We agreed we had to find him a home."  
  
"I wish there was another option too D'Argo, but this is the best we can do for him," Aeryn said. "He will have a childhood here and maybe he won't be taken, we can't be sure."  
  
"Or are we just telling ourselves that to make us feel better?" D'Argo replied.  
  
"Being on the run is no life for a child," Crichton said. "This may not be perfect, but it's the best we can do."  
  
***  
  
The others had left to go back to Moya. Crais was still at the house. He knew that he must leave soon. He didn't know quite what he was waiting for, but it felt to him like something else had to happen before he could leave. He was sitting on the steps outside the house, watching the sunset. It was a sight he remembered and loved from his childhood.   
  
He heard footsteps behind him.  
  
"Bialar, you must come," Laili said.  
  
Crais knew what it was without asking.  
  
His father gave a weak smile as Crais approached his bedside. It took him a while to find his voice.  
  
"I've always wondered, all these cycles, why I was still here. I had nothing to live for anymore. I guess now I understand, I had to wait for you to come back."  
  
Crais didn't know how to answer.  
  
"I've regretted a few things in my life, but it's too late to change most of them. One thing I can do though, is to explain to you the way I was when you were young."  
  
He paused, struggling to find the right words.  
  
"I always knew that you would be taken one day. I thought it would be easier for you if you weren't too attached to me. I kept you boys at arms length all the time. But I was wrong, that just made it easier for me. All these years you've been gone, I've regretted that. I just wanted to let you know that...I'm proud of you."  
  
His eyes closed and, for the first time that he could remember, Bialar Crais broke down and wept.  
  
***  
  
He felt better. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He no longer felt like a failure. He only wished that he'd had more time with his father.   
  
He was deep in thought as he headed to the medilab to see Jool. His mind had come back to the conversation they'd had before they set foot on the planet. He was still sure that there was something she wasn't telling him, and he intended to find out what it was.  
  
"Jool," he said, as he came in, "I have been thinking more about our earlier conversation."  
  
"Oh?" She said. He was sure her shoulders had stiffened.  
  
"I believe," he said, slowly, "that I would like to raise a family eventually."  
  
"Oh," she said again. "I wish you luck with that."  
  
"Don't you mean, wish *us* luck?" Crais asked.  
  
"No," she said. "I mean you."  
  
"You do not want children then?"  
  
"It's not that I don't want them, it's just...."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I...can't have them. It's medical and irreversible, before you ask. I discovered it in a routine screening four cycles ago."  
  
"I knew there was something you were not telling me."  
  
"Well now you know," she said. "What are you going to do?"  
  
"It does not matter to me at the present time."  
  
"But it will, later on?"  
  
"Perhaps. I suggest we delay thinking about it until it does."  
  
"It's not going to go away."  
  
"I know that, but it may never become a difficulty for us."  
  
Somehow, Jool found that hard to believe.  
  
***  
  
Aeryn was on Talyn, searching for her personnel file that Crais had accessed from Peacekeeper command. The events lately had made her think about the child she'd lost, and she'd found that she was curious to know who the father had been. She wasn't sure if it would be listed on her file, but that was the best idea she had.  
  
When she found it, she scanned it, looking for a reference to genetic birthings. When she found it, she went white.  
  
"Talyn," she said, "restrict access to this file. Myself only."  
  
She gripped the panel for support. No one must ever read this file. If Crais should find it, or worse Crichton, they might never get over it. Of all the people it could have been! How had she come to have a child with Captain Bialar Crais?  
  
***  
  
Many cycles later, on a Peacekeeper Command Carrier, a young officer marched into Command. He approached his new commanding officer and stood to attention.  
  
"Officer Tauvo Crais reporting for duty, Sir!" 


	5. Big Brother

'Big Brother'  
  
  
Jool turned, but saw no one. She was certain that someone was watching her. She'd had this feeling ever since she set foot on Talyn. Probably she was being paranoid. She just wasn't used to staying here so long. She'd only intended to be there one solar day. She and Crais had been discussing how they could combat the cybernetic bleedback caused by Crais' neural link to Talyn and she had come over to test some theories. Then the Command Carrier had shown up and they'd been forced to starburst immediately. There hadn't been time for Jool to return.  
  
Not that staying with Crais was a bad thing. They didn't usually get this much time alone. Having him being her only company, however, could be a little straining. Crais was accustomed to being alone with Talyn much of the time, which left Jool feeling very lonely. That was the reason she'd started working on this project. Her initial attempts to reduce the bleedback had failed, so she was working on a new approach.  
  
Truthfully, she was feeling rather annoyed. Talyn seemed to take up so much of Crais' time that it was impossible to see him. Surely he should make a little time to see her. After all, there were plenty of things that Talyn couldn't do that she definitely could - and would, given half a chance. But the last fourteen solar days had brought one problem after another, all requiring Crais' constant presence in command. It almost felt like he was trying to find excuses to stay away from her.  
  
That was it, wasn't it! She'd known he could never accept what she'd told him after Tauvo had left. He'd said it didn't matter, but now it obviously did and rather than admit he'd changed his mind, he was just avoiding her. He didn't even have the good manners to tell her to her face. 'I should have listened to D'Argo', she thought, 'he told me that this was a bad idea'. So now here she was, stuck on this ship with a man who didn't want to see her anymore. Was she jinxed?   
  
"Why the hezmana does the bad stuff always happen to me?" she asked out loud.  
  
No one answered.  
  
***  
  
Crais unzipped his jacket part way so it wasn't so tight around his neck. How long had he been here? He'd come up here to fix one conduit, but before he'd managed to finish, six more had blown. The last fourteen solar days had been one long race. Everything that could go wrong, had. First came the starburst which had overloaded half of Talyn's circuits. Then, just as he and the DRDs had managed to fix them all, the propulsion system had jammed, then they'd had to resupply, then Talyn had managed to knock out his canon shooting asteroids. He'd barely left command except to snatch a few hours sleep when he could no longer focus on his work. At first he'd thought that Jool might have been trying to be helpful again, but he'd given her strict orders to leave repairs to him and, for once, she seemed to have obeyed. Or, at any rate, he had no evidence that she hadn't.  
  
Jool. How long had it been since he'd seen her? He hardly seemed to have caught a glimpse of her since she set foot on Talyn. He certainly wasn't adverse to having her here, provided she didn't try to assist him again, and he'd been looking forward to spending some more time alone with her. As it was, they'd barely exchanged two words.  
  
Crais decided to take a break. Everything finally seemed to be in working order so maybe he could take an arn off. He really needed sleep but, with luck, he could leave that until later. He was just walking out of the door when an alarm sounded, telling his tired brain that yet another thing had gone wrong. Crais sighed and went back to work.  
  
***  
  
Jool was in the shower. She noticed the sound as soon as she finished washing her hair. She poked her head out to see what it was.   
  
It was a DRD. It seemed to be doing repairs to a cable. Why it was doing repairs in her bathroom while she was having a shower was more of a mystery. It picked up the piece of cable and started to move towards her.  
  
Jool only realised what it was going to do a moment before it did it and made a desperate leap to get out before the cable made contact with the very wet floor. Hurriedly wrapping a towel around herself, she left her quarters and headed for command as fast as she could go.  
  
Jool stumbled into command. Crais looked up and took in the sight. Barefooted and wearing only a towel, her wet hair hanging around her face - what was she doing? Jool stood there, gasping for breath.  
  
"That thing tried to electrocute me!" she said.  
  
"What?" Crais asked, briefly wondering if this was a hallucination.  
  
"The DRD in my shower tried to electrocute me!"  
  
"Why would there be a DRD in your shower?" Crais asked, now wondering if Jool had gone mad.  
  
"There was a DRD in my bathroom while I was taking my shower. It pulled a cable out of the wall and the frelling thing tried to electrocute me with it!"  
  
"There is no reason for a DRD to be in your quarters, none of the damaged conduits are situated in that area."  
  
"I know that! I'm telling you that that DRD tried to kill me!"  
  
"That is not possible."  
  
"Fine," Jool said. "Don't believe me. You have access to the internal sensors don't you? Check my bathroom and you'll see the cable."  
  
Crais checked.  
  
"I see nothing unusual," he said.  
  
"That DRD tried to kill me!" Jool squeaked. "Maybe it repaired the cable after I left."  
  
"Why would a DRD want to kill you?"  
  
"I don't know," she said. "Maybe it's malfunctioning. All I know is, it tried to electrocute me - what are you going to do about it?"  
  
"What do you suggest I do about it?" Crais said, lack of sleep making him more than a little short-tempered.  
  
"You control the DRDs don't you?"  
  
"Talyn controls the DRDs. I can access them if necessary."  
  
"Can't you shut them down so you can figure out what the hezmana is wrong with this one?"  
  
"With the volume of repairs that still require doing it is impossible to shut down the DRDs. When Talyn is fully repaired perhaps I can do something. However, I find it extremely unlikely that a DRD would purposely try to electrocute you. I expect that it was merely an accident."  
  
"An accident? I nearly died and that's the best you can do?! Well, fine, get on with your precious repairs. While you're at it, get Talyn to find Moya. I don't want to stay here any longer than I have to."  
  
With that she stormed out.  
  
Crais groaned. Could anything else go wrong? He should go after her. He swiped his hand over the door controls but they didn't open.   
  
"Talyn," he said. "Open the door."  
  
The door still didn't open. The controls had jammed. For a brief moment Crais put his head in his hands. This had to be the last thing that would go wrong.  
  
***  
  
Jool was in her quarters, shivering. The temperature seemed to have dropped dramatically since she'd left. At least the DRD was gone, but Talyn didn't seem to be able to fix the environmentals. She curled up in bed, trying to stay warm.   
  
At first she didn't notice anything. Slowly she noticed the strange smell, then felt the gas begin to make her throat burn. Before long she was struggling for breath. She jumped up, coughing and stumbled across the room to the door.  
  
It wouldn't open.  
  
She tried her comms but they were out too. Jool was still banging on the door when she lost consciousness.  
  
***  
  
Crais walked to Jool's quarters in a daze. It had taken him half an arn to fix the door controls and he was exhausted after the day he'd had. He became much more alert when he realised that the door here was jammed too.  
  
"Talyn," he said. "Open this door."  
  
Talyn refused. Crais, alarmed by Talyn's behaviour, accessed the internal sensors. Talyn resisted with all his might, but Crais insisted.  
  
The room swam into focus. Everything appeared normal. Then he came to the door and saw Jool in a heap on the floor. Then his mind registered the high quantities of furium gas in there. Furium was a poisonous by-product that Talyn produced. He usually recycled it himself. This was no accident.  
  
"Talyn!" Crais yelled. "What have you done?"  
  
He grabbed his pulse pistol and aimed for the door controls. Before he could fire, Talyn attacked.  
  
Crais screamed with pain and fell to his knees. Talyn continued the onslaught until Crais could barely move. Shaking, he remained on the floor.  
  
"Talyn," he said, struggling to speak. "Why are you doing this?"  
  
'She is a threat.'   
  
"To whom?" Crais asked.  
  
'To you.'  
  
"Why would you think that?"  
  
'She is not a Peacekeeper, she is not a Sebacean. She cannot be trusted. You taught me that.'  
  
"I was wrong," Crais said, feelings of guilt washing over him.  
  
'You were right.'  
  
"Talyn, this is not about that. There have been others on this ship before - not Peacekeepers, not Sebaceans - why would you attack Jool? She is no threat to either of us."  
  
'You will be better off without her.'  
  
"So you're going to kill her?" Crais said, trying to sit up.  
  
'It is best for both of us. Without her, we will be alone again, safe.'  
  
"You think that I will remain here after you kill her?" Crais said, almost laughing.  
  
'You must.'  
  
"I will leave, Talyn. We will find Moya and I will leave. If you can kill her, why would you not kill me too?"  
  
'You are my friend.'  
  
"I am your friend?" Crais said, in disbelief. "You torture me, you try to kill the person I care most about and you still call me your friend."  
  
'She is bad for you.'  
  
"No Talyn," Crais said, managing to prop himself up. "She is good for me. You mean she is bad for you. You think that she will take me away from you. But, Talyn, if you kill her, you will lose me too."  
  
'No, I will keep you here.'  
  
"No," Crais said. "You won't."  
  
He reached the back of his neck and pulled the transponder out. Talyn shuddered. Then he picked up his pulse pistol and fired. The door controls fried. Staggering a little as he got to his feet, Crais braced himself against the bulkhead and forced the door open. When he managed to move it, he pulled the unconscious Jool out.  
  
He searched for a pulse. It was still there, but very faint. As the oxygen entered her system, she slowly began to come around.  
  
"What happened?" she asked groggily.  
  
"That will take some time to explain," Crais replied.  
  
***  
  
"Are you prepared to listen now?"   
  
Talyn gave a small, rather subdued sound. Crais, taking that for consent, continued.  
  
"Talyn, if you wish me to remain as your Captain, you must realise that we must work together. You cannot expect to control me. You must respect my needs, as I respect yours."  
  
Talyn chirped in return.  
  
"Talyn," Crais asked. "Did you deliberately cause all the malfunctions that we have had?"  
  
There was silence, then a very small chirp.  
  
"Talyn, you must learn that I have a life other than that I share with you. I will not allow you to harm my friends. If you cannot accept this, tell me so, and I will leave. If you wish me to remain, you must learn this."  
  
Jool tentatively entered command.  
  
"Talyn," Crais said. "I believe that you should say something to Jool."  
  
Talyn lowered his lights and made a small, pathetic noise.  
  
"He says that he is sorry," Crais said.  
  
"Sorry?" Jool said, her nerves disappearing. "Sorry is what you say when you lose something you borrowed. He tried to kill me!"  
  
Talyn made a moaning sound.  
  
"He is still a child," Crais said, in a low voice. "It is hard for him to admit when he is wrong."  
  
"Are you talking about him or about yourself?" Jool said.  
  
"Perhaps both," Crais said. "Talyn has learned much from me. I regret that some of it was rather...misguided."  
  
Jool regarded him, then spoke to the ceiling.  
  
"Talyn, I will...accept your apology."  
  
Talyn responded with a happy chirp. 


End file.
